I’ve been driving my kids to school for the past few weeks as opposed to letting them ride the bus because nobody seems to be able to tell me what’s happening with our driver.

At one point he was standing at the front of the bus while another driver was behind the wheel. When the kids asked why he wasn’t driving, he told them it was for their own protection and it was for personal reasons.

As a parent, you might think, perhaps the poor gentleman injured himself or perhaps he was recreating the scene from Titanic where Kate Winslet’s character leans over the stern of the ship (I have no idea if that was the stern or the mast or if she was starboard because I’ve completely forgotten that camp game) but instead of a ship, he is on a bus. And instead of Kate Winslet, he’s a guy in a fluorescent safety vest.

You might think those things if you’re a parent.

But you might also think, how long has he been a drug dealer? Is he holding the bus and the kids hostage? Is he replaying the movie Speed in his mind endangering all of those innocent children?

I later learned through the first ever successful game of telephone in the school parking lot that our driver had been driving without a license, was caught by the bus police and that there would be an interim replacement.

At least it sounded like that from one parent. Another just said, “Smeary muppets in the fountain range?” and then we all cracked up laughing. Ah telephone.

I wanted to give the new driver a chance to learn the route and get settled in the position before I started loading my kids back onto the bus so I gave it a week before we lined up to get back on.

Except the day we went to get back on, the old driver, (played by Leo DiCaprio) was back behind the wheel.

I haven’t been given a reason for his absence that satisfies me enough to let my kids back on and once again, the fatally flawed game of telephone has completely broken down.

Would you be comfortable putting your kids back on the bus?