We received a call from friends who are having their first baby, a girl and they wanted to be sure we still have all of our “stuff.”
Funny, the minute Chloe stops using something and/or grows out of a baby-related item, I donate it, give it away or burn it in my no-more-baby-stuff/come-on-mommy’s-private-sanctuary-bonfire.
It did however get me thinking about what you really need when expecting your first baby and how many lists you will reference to prepare for the exciting arrival.
Starting with the crib, change table and dresser trifecta. We found a set of three that suited our needs, a place to sleep a place to change diapers and a place to store clothing, sold. We never considered the fact that this furniture is pretty cheaply made and we never had any intention of keeping it long term, knowing we would one day replace the dwarf wood with something that was better built and less babyish. We also never considered just buying the crib and change table and as it turned out, the dresser sat empty for seven years, finishing nails shaking nervously every time we walked past as it could barely stand upright. We didn’t think to buy just two pieces because who were we to break up a set?
Good friends of ours converted a dresser into a dresser/change-table and had a crib in the room. Though they missed that amazing feng shui triangle baby nursery smell, they saved space and money by just using just the two pieces. Why didn’t we think of that?
Swing. I couldn’t find one baby list, friend, store clerk, gypsy or Wiccan who didn’t recommend buying a swing for our first born. “Your baby will LIVE in the swing,” they all claimed, followed by testimonials of how their children are smarter, calmer, cuter, better behaved, not obese with charismatic personalities and smooth, shiny coats all because of their time spent in swings as babies.
Our baby hated the swing. We set her in it and she screamed louder than I thought a human could scream. She would have called Children’s Aid to pick her up and remove her from our care if we tried one more time to set her in the twinkle, twinkle little star swinging torture chamber. I can remember thinking, maybe the music should be louder or I’ll kick it lightly from the underside to give it that extra bit of bounce. It recently sold for $0 on Kijiji and was placed on our front porch, free to an undeserving child and a couple of clueless, over-researched parents.
Baby Einstein videos—crack. There was a report a couple of years ago claiming the company would refund anyone who felt their child wasn’t a genius after watching those videos. Hmmmm. I wonder how many genius parents came forward with a receipt, a library of DVD’s and a bug-eyed, confused, deflated, t.v. addicted child, admitting that not only is their child not a genius but they were dumb enough to believe by plunking them in front of the set for hours on end they would actually unmask the secret to the Caramilk bar.
Bouncy Chair—We received a bouncy chair as a shower gift when Hanna was born. She enjoyed sitting in that chair, watching the arch with dangling toys and loved the bonding time she had with our feet as we rocked it back and forth until the cramps made us so weak we were nearly hospitalized. Greg once suggested, “You know what someone should invent? A battery operated bouncy chair that rocked itself so parents didn’t have to.” Apparently they had, found in every children’s store on the planet. We just happened to have a cheap friend who gave us a shell of the actual bouncy chair, I suspect to laugh at us behind our backs. It’s worth splurging on the battery operated version but test it on your baby first, lest it suffer the same fate as Kijiji swing.
Breast Pump—My best advice with a breast pump is save your pennies and your nipples and rent the “good” one from the hospital. I didn’t know this was an option and I forked out a couple hundred bucks for a unit that squeezed me dry (or so I thought), I handed over the very first pumped bottle to my Mother who was assigned babysitting duty while Greg and I winced then gingerly tucked a nursing pad into my bra to attend a wedding. She looked at the bottle wondering if it was just the lighting or angle she was holding it because aside from two drops that barely covered the bottom of the bottle, there wasn’t any milk to be seen. I argued that maybe that’s how much the baby gets when nursing? How would I know how much milk was actually consumed, it wasn’t a transparent process? In speaking with other moms, the hospital, double pump is quick, easy and it actually works.
Baby bjorn, splurge on the extra long straps so Dad can’t say it isn’t long enough to participate in snuggle time with the baby while he vacuums, cooks and folds the laundry.
Stroller—easy to collapse with a drink holder. These are really the only features that were important to me. I am not a marathon runner and therefore didn’t require a lot of extras and snow tires bigger than those on my minivan. Do I wish I had spent a little more on something higher end? Perhaps, had I known I was going to have three kids I might have invested a little more but it’s still a chair on wheels and has gotten all three kids around without incident. I can think of better ways than spending thousands of dollars on a stroller, tensor bandages for bouncy castle shins for example.
Here’s what you do need–A sense of humour. If you can laugh at the bags under your eyes, your hairy legs, your hairy eyes, your shirts with shoulders failing any random sniff test, your clothes that don’t fit, your pony-tail with an elastic hidden somewhere under a nest of hair then you’ll be a great parent. The rest will come in time and will be dictated by the needs and wants of the child.
Yes, we’ll save our stuff. I think we have a breast pump that maxes out at two drops and a “gently used” stroller.
