My day started with a 4:58 am wake-up call from Ellie. I heard shrieks of “Mommy-Daddy-Mommy-Daddy” knowing full well the “Daddy” portion was simply to be inclusive, she’s most certainly not expecting the Daddy part of that shout-out to arrive in her room at that ridiculous hour.

Ellie: I heard a noise in my brain.

Me too. It said “Daddy”, but where is he?

So I started a little early today but was somewhat excited to be sporting some new underwear. The label on the package listed “Do not iron” as one of the warnings. Do not worry makers of Hanes undergarments, I won’t let you down. My iron has been plugged in six times this year, five of those were to melt some beads together for a craft the girls were working on, the sixth, was to remove a heat mark from my dining room table.