With just a week before school, we’re still trying to fit in some fun activities the kids will remember for a lifetime, for example, taking them on a tour of their Aunt and Uncle’s new house.
We went to visit my brother’s new house today and I lectured the girls en route about being on their best behaviour.
I explained they were to try their best not to spill, break or destroy any furniture, tile, rugs, faucets or countertops and if they did, I would have to take something away that was really important, like their mattresses. Obviously an idle threat but I needed it to seem legitimate.
Walking through a home where the owners have no kids is quite different than walking through a home where kids are present. The absence of toys, general mess and untidiness sends us immediately into a state of unrest.
Ellie (5): Can we ask questions?
Me: Sure.
Hanna (7): Can we tell them where to move things if we don’t like where they put them?
Me: Ok.
Ellie: Can we ask them if the house is attached to another house?
Me: Yes, but it isn’t.
Hanna: Why is there a funny lock on the door?
Me: That’s a realtor lock and I’m not exactly sure why it’s still on there.
Ellie: Can we ask them about it and if we can take it off?
Me: That would be fine.
Hanna: Can we take it home?
Me: No.
Hanna: Can we have a drink?
Me: No, you just had a drink so please don’t ask for food or drinks. Remember your Aunt and Uncle don’t have kids so they won’t be prepared with all of the things you’re used to having right at your fingertips at home.
About thirty seconds into the tour the three of them were sitting on high, leather stools with gigantic, crystal glasses drinking cranberry juice and pretending it was wine. The split-screen at our house would have the kids on low-to-the-floor plastic, IKEA chairs with plastic (BPA free of course) thimble size cups with an ounce of water, milk or apple juice.
They were taken by the minimalist approach. There were no baskets overflowing with broken toys. The decorating was tasteful, breakable and to scale for the space, whereas our pieces tend to be covered with someone’s pipe cleaner collection, in some respects offensive, malleable and mostly miniature regardless of wall availability.
They seemed impressed with this foreign lifestyle.
There were no piles of laundry; waiting to be washed, waiting for the dryer, waiting to be folded, waiting to be put away. The fridge wasn’t jammed with juice boxes because they were on sale last week, apple sauce or homogenized milk. The foods seemed to be grown-up foods that were likely eaten any hour of the day they felt like it.
The furniture had defined edges and corners rather than smooth, sometimes man-made, rounded corners with a hint of chalk smear.
There was no diaper genie and no strange diaper odour.
The kids were impressed and asked to stay a little longer.
Absolutely, in fact, I think I might drop them off more often. It’ll give me a chance to clean up.
Also, cranberry juice does taste better in a real glass. I miss it.
