A Cluttered Chapter….

There are too many excuses to list. I look around the house and see plants that need watering. When I have water in the house, this is a task I can take on. There is no risk, just water. No need to worry about being vulnerable, about putting myself out there in front of strangers, in front of my family, in front of friends who might judge me in a new way based on what they see on paper. I have made excuses for why I don’t have time to write for far too long. My house looks like every room is a play room, I then shift toys from basket to basket, room to room rather than taking the time to write. My ottoman has become the world’s biggest change table. I shuffle diapers into a neatly stacked pile and move them onto the end table rather than turning on my laptop. I turned my office into a guest room because the very thought of setting foot in there for anything related to advertising sales made me sick to my stomach. Unfortunately, it was also the room that housed my computer for the better part of ten years. I have parked myself at a dining room table with a “For Sale” sign on it, cluttered with school newsletters, the preschool fundraiser notes, partial grocery lists and several scratch and win tickets that were not winners but I’m too afraid to pitch on the off chance I have missed reading a number and they are in fact holding a grand prize and a world of happiness. No more excuses. Just write.

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