I never buy anything that requires alterations.
I know people think when you buys jeans, they’re not meant to fit at all, like not even close, so they spend twice as much as they spent on the pants having tiny elves (and a handful of mice) craft them to their exact body shape and size.
I think of clothes more as a basic, human necessity to avoid shameful, public humiliation and fall squarely into the category, “Does the zipper work? Good enough.”
I did however buy a dress that was a smidge on the big side a couple of months ago.
A smidge is usually something I can live with but for some reason, this smidge is gaping right around my armpit and what if I forget to shave just that side for a month? The smidge must be fixed to save us all from a lot of unwanted/expensive therapy.
So, I packed our three girls into the mini-van, gaping, arm-pit dress in tow and I drove to the one and only tailor within a thirty km radius.
This same tailor was recommended to me by the sales girl who sold me the dress (who clearly got a kick-back from all of the jeans she had sent to him and his mice).
That’s two nods to the same tailor, one from a local retailer and one from the internet.
Off we went.
By the time I found a parking spot (that I had to pay for), loaded one kid on my back whose feet were too sminky to walk on, rolled the dress under the arm for which it was meant to stop gaping, lead the other two mother-goose and duckling style a block away, I noticed a sign on the front window of the shop:
We are closed for holidays from July 1st until August 25th, 2014.
So the entire summer?
Do people not alter things in the summer? I guess there are no big events like oh right, weddings or gaping arm-pits in the summer.
I turned, careful not to slam my four year olds back up against the glass and deflated, started marching the littles back to the mini-van.
Hanna said, “Mommy, are you upset? Can I carry your purse? Oh, can I carry your purse is your phone in there? Are there any games on it?”
Chloe said, “Mommy, sorry your dress will be big still. Can you carry me in the front now, your neck is sweaty.”
Ellie had the best line of all. “Mommy, you can squeeze into one of my dresses. Any one you want.”
This made me smile. A lot.
Then I heard her whisper to the others, “Poor, old Mom.”